Twist and Shout

Twist and Shout
Life is never straight (Joey Kulkin photo)

Tuesday, May 1, 2012

Drunk in The Burg

TRENTON -- I thought he was dead. Then he moved his back. But was it a death spasm? Then I thought he had a broken neck. Did he fall, break his neck and die? I crouched over and saw that his eyes were wide open. Spookily wide open. The thousand-yard stare. I think I heard a grunt. Definitely a grunt. Nick Nolte, is that you? A car with two women and two kids drove north on South Clinton but stopped in the middle of the street. "Is he dead?" "I don't think so. I saw him move." "Call 911." "I just did." The car flipped a bitch and parked. "You should tell 911 he got shot -- then you KNOW they'll race over here." "Well, I called them and said he looks dead, so they'll be here quick enough." The car drove away. Two girls approached and kind of shifted as far to the edge of the sidewalk toward the street as they could. One girl looked at the guy and was kind of freaked out. Up walked a man with muscles and tatts, and he crouched over the crumpled man. "I called 911. They're on the way." "Thanks, man, most people would just walk by." Muscles McTatt saw that Crumples McDrunk was breathing, so he shook my hand and walked away. I took more pictures. Yes, I took more pictures. I take pictures, that's what I do. I give anyone permission to take my picture if I'm ever crumpled on a public sidewalk with eyes wide open and grunting like Nick Nolte trying to recite the alphabet backward. A cop drove north on South Clinton, and I waved him down. Told him I called 911 and that it had been at least 5 minutes. The cop flipped a bitch on High Street and parked in front of the crumpled man. That's when we heard the ambulance sirens, and 30 seconds later they had arrived.

"He's a regular," one of the EMT guys said as another EMT administered a hand-squeeze test and said, "something's not right."

He's not dead. Physically, anyway.

Welcome to Chambersburg.

I like to photograph smokers, too

The soup, salad and bread (and Mack) at Pat's Diner in South Trenton