Twist and Shout

Twist and Shout
Life is never straight (Joey Kulkin photo)

Friday, July 11, 2014

Bron Bron Galore


Was climbing the Stairmaster, thinking about the girl who spins my gears something fierce, sweatin' up a storm, watching ESPN heads rap about LeBron to the Cavs on the TV on the elliptical in the row ahead of me, breathing hard, breathing hard, in nose out mouth, second wind, sweating like a beast, sweatin' up a storm, climbing and climbing, one step at a time, listening to the grinding of the gears in the guts of the stairs, which sounds like the grinding of the gears on the bottom of the cabin ascending the rails of a coaster, step up step up as the stairs roll down, the girl and LeBron, le girl and the Bron, sweat dripping and dropping, and look at that puddle, lathered in butter, two and three and four at a time, really sweatin' up a storm, second wind strong, and Bron Bron's a Cav, second time around, grinding of the gears, Colossus, Thunder Mountain, Splash Mountain, the grinding of the gears shouldn't be so loud, drip drip drop drop look at the puddle grow, shirt soaked, pepper and go and go JoJo go, higher bars faster steps, lower bars slower steps, 6 minutes, 7 minutes, 8 minutes, 9, that chain ain't gonna make it, and shame on you for this endless loop of Bron highlights, sweatin' up a storm, drips and drops and rivulets and look at the puddle below, 10 minutes, 11 minutes, and pepper and go, t-shirt's an ocean, girl's on my mind, forever on my mind, and BOOM! the stairs slam to a halt!

Flat-out freeze.

I broke Stairmaster.

So I walked to the ellipticals and climbed aboard. And watched more Bron Bron Galore.